On most days...I just love my job. There is so much joy each day. I love seeing my little friends as they soak up new information. I love to watch their hearts be kind to each other. I enjoy watching them make good choices. There are so many wonderful sights I get to see as a teacher! I often wonder as I teach cursive....am I teaching a doctor to sign their name (illegible of course! haha)? Am I teaching a president to sign their name? Endless potential in this class of thirty!
But...there are some days my heart just breaks. There are children you just can't reach. These children who come from horrible homes. Homes that stunt who they are....homes that quench their fires. And there isn't ONE thing I can do about it! It continues to frustrate me year after year!
I often want to write a book to let the general public know what our young people have to deal with these days. I really don't think society understands what children are exposed to...NO, not through the media, or from the music they listen to...it is from their very OWN homes.
Children whose parents are locked up in jail: these children throw around words like, "time served" and "parole officer"
Children whose parents are drug addicts: these children throw around words like, "rehab" and "clean"
Children whose parents have lost custody: these children throw around words like, "my case worker" and "my visitation time"
Some days it is just all too much. How am I to make a 9 year old excited to learn their multiplication facts when they are going home to a grandmother who is doing her best to support her three grandchildren while her daughter is in jail for drugs???????
There are so many I want to take home with me. I want to show them a loving mother and father. A 'present' parent who is excited when they walk through the door. A parent who takes care of their basic needs so they can focus on "kids stuff". A parent who ensures warm water in the shower each morning. A parent who sacrifices sleeping in Saturday morning so they can learn the sport of soccer or baseball!
But you and I both know my home isn't that big...nor would the state allow me to take each of these children. So....for now...I will wake up tomorrow....say a prayer...use my gift of teaching...and make the 6 hours they are with me a time of security, fun, and learning.